I urge you to read through this post before you comment.

Young, nice body, and four kids by different men is not a good look for any female.  Unless you have recently been divorced or widowed, you are an exception to this popular opinion.  I am referring to women who are competent and choose to make poor sexual decisions. I understand that slip-ups happen during a moment of intimacy, and I understand your choice to live a wild and loose lifestyle. Do know that there are consequences for each of the previous actions that can result in a child or two.

I do not have children, but I know that it can be a difficult task, especially if you are single and have more than two children. The demands of the household fall on you.  If you earn below the poverty line, having multiple children can be financially stressful and depressing. Why would you want to add more children to your household knowing that it could cause additional financial hardships? This is why it disturbs me to see women with multiple children by multiple men. I often think back to a conversation I had with my dad when I was younger. He told me that a man is not obligated to stay with you once he gets you pregnant. You are the one that has to birth the baby. That man is free to do whatever he wants to do.

Ladies, did you know that you are considered as a brand? For instance, the job that interviews you considers you as a brand. Interviewers often ask questions that will somewhat force you to provide details on your personal life. For example, what are your hobbies? If you have children, you may mention something that has to do with you spending time with your children. This question may lead to another trick question to see if your married or how many kids you have. If your answer is not appealing, the job interviewer may give you an uncanny look. Ok, I know what some of you ladies are thinking, you don’t care what people think of you. This belief should be used with caution because when it comes to obtaining a job, you should care what people think of you!  Next, if you are a heterosexual woman, you are a brand to men. Most of today’s men are not attracted to a woman who has four kids with different men. One of the reasons is because he may want children or more children. If you have four and he has two, that is six kids! There is a possibility that both of you may want a child together. This will result into both of you having seven kids! If it’s one thing a man fears besides never having sex again is going broke. It takes almost $233, 000 to raise one kid to the age of seven-teen. Multiply that by the number of kids you have.

If you are a woman who has had three to four kids by different men, I want you to use your past experience to educate the upcoming young women. They need to hear from someone who has experienced the hardships of life. If it’s one thing that I have learned working in the education system, is that kids learn from others trials and tribulations. Explain to these young girls that there are certain things that you cannot undo in your life and you have to make the best of it. Tell them to make wise decisions about their sexual partners. Encourage them to get on birth control and use condoms. Show these young women the finances that are involved with having multiple children.  Your experiences are enough to change the upcoming generations and that is something that we need to keep striving for within our communities.